there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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