I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
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He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
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And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
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