I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize