I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Do you remember whose house we're in?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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