Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
