Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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