im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
