I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
