that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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