She went from zero to smokin in five shots
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I love having hate sex.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
