It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
