Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
