I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
