I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I'm sobbing to NWA
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
