What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Buhtt sex?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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