i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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