Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
He is an equal opportunity slut.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
