the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Why is there bacon in the couch?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
