We named our party play list daddy issues
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
