Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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