if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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