Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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