Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
