They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
