I look better un-naked...
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
