I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
