I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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