apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Randomize
