Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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