Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize