are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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