I think I just saw someone hide a body.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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