Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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