fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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