As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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