are you so shy because you have an std?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Come share oat with me in your robe
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize