you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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