before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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