Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
