I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
She told me I should be a condom model.
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Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
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oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
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