I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
