So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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