Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
