when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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