so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
