he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
How's work?
Spinning.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
