i would punch a child for taco bell
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
