I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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