So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
