Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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